Happy St. Patrick's Day (1976)

I am half Italian and half Irish, so dressing me up in traditional Irish get-ups for St. Patrick's day was always a fun grown-up pastime in my house. My step-dad is also Irish, and the following blessing hangs in my mother's home:

Irish Luck

Ample food and sturdy drink,

A clean pillow for your head,

And my you be forty years

in heaven

B'fore the Devil knows you're dead.

Happy St. Patrick's Day to all my friends and family - wishing you the luck of the Irish now and always.

Dress from Ireland - 1976

Irish Temper and Italian Attitude = one Sassy 3-year old

My maiden name (revealed on shamrock) is Gibbons. Later we learned my father's family name was "McGibbon" before they immigrated

A Love Poem...

I shared this poem today with my seniors... it's one of my favorite "love poems" - Happy Valentine's Day.

Poem: "I Love You Sweatheart," by Thomas Lux 
from New and Selected Poems: 1975-1995 (Houghton Mifflin Co.).

I Love You Sweatheart

A man risked his life to write the words.
A man hung upside down (an idiot friend
holding his legs?) with spray paint
to write the words on a girder fifty feet above
a highway. And his beloved,
the next morning driving to work…?
His words are not (meant to be) so unique.
Does she recognize his handwriting?
Did he hint to her at her doorstep the night before
of "something special, darling, tomorrow"?
And did he call her at work
expecting her to faint with delight
at his celebration of her, his passion, his risk?
She will know I love her now,
the world will know my love for her!
A man risked his life to write the words.
Love is like this at the bone, we hope, love
is like this, Sweetheart, all sore and dumb
and dangerous, ignited, blessed - always,
regardless, no exceptions,
always in blazing matters like these: blessed.

Puppy Love

"Cheese" the Dachshund

I turned on the TV a few moments ago, just as "Cheese" - a long haired golden Dachshund - was prancing around the circle at the Westminster Dog Show. It made me smile, giggle and cry a little, all at the same time.

You see... on Saturday I'll be flying home to California to visit my family, and my dogs. 

And while "the boys": Bently (Whippet) and Charlie (long haired black Dachshund) will be there, along with my sister's baby Lil (a tiny Chihuahua) ... my little girl Gretchen - a long haired golden Dachshund (who by the way looked remarkably like "Cheese" in her youth) - will be missing.

Gretchen died a few weeks ago, and for the first time in 16 years, I will not be greeted by her waggling tail (and I do mean "waggling" because she wiggled as she wagged), nor her deep throaty bark as I slide through the door with my luggage. The house will be different without her.

Perhaps it isn't a coincidence that the Westminster Dog Show is being held on the eve of St. Valentine's Day, for there are few things more wonderful than the love of a dog. In fact, my first word was not "mom" or "dad", it was "aboom" which was the name of our Westie. (Her real name was Abby, but "aboom" came pretty close for a toddler.)  In a way, you could say that Abby was my first love... my first experience with pure devotion and unbridled joy. Abby and I were inseparable growing up, and I can honestly say that she was the best friend a little girl could ever want. It's true what Dean Koontz says in A Big Little Life: A Memoir of a Joyful Dog:

Abby and I - Enjoying Dad's Nightly Bedtime Stories

“No matter how close we are to another person, few human relationships are as free from strife, disagreement, and frustration as is the relationship you have with a good dog. Few human beings give of themselves to another as a dog gives of itself. I also suspect that we cherish dogs because their unblemished souls make us wish - consciously or unconsciously - that we were as innocent as they are, and make us yearn for a place where innocence is universal and where the meanness, the betrayals, and the cruelties of this world are unknown.”

Christmas Party at the Laurita Winery

Gary graduated from a small school, Spotswood High School, where he teaches today. He and his high school group of friends have remained close, and every year the McPartlands throw a wonderful Christmas party that gathers their old high school gang together. This year, the party was held at the Laurita Winery in New Egypt, NJ. (Yup - New Jersey has wineries too! In fact, according to a NYT article, NJ produces 412,000 cases of wine a year.)

The winery was enchanting, and had a wonderful private space upstairs for our gathering. Gary and I have already begun planning a return visit, to sit by the grand fireplace, sip wine, and chat the night away. The Laurita Winery is truly a little gem in Jersey.

NY Times Article on the Laurita Winery

“France was the renowned wine capital of the world,” Mr. Johnson said. “And then they started to do some good stuff in California. Then California took off. Long Island’s doing the same thing, and New Jersey will follow.” - Owner of Laurita Winery

"Let Me Not Keep Christmas"

Christmas, 1978 - 4 years old

Let Me Not Keep Christmas, by Linda Felver

"Let me not wrap, stack, box, bag, tie, tag, bundle, seal, keep Christmas. Christmas kept is liable to mold. Let me give Christmas away, unwrapped, by exuberant armfuls. Let me share, dance, live Christmas unpretentiously, merrily, responsibly with overflowing hands, tireless steps and sparkling eyes. Christmas given way will stay fresh - even until it comes again."

A Very Helmetta Christmas...

Helmetta is a small town - population of 2,008, which is about 400 people more than the student body at the high school where I teach. But with a small town comes charming holiday traditions... like this one:

The weekend before Christmas, "Santa" comes to town...  police cars drive around the neighborhoods blasting Christmas music out of their bullhorn speakers to alert the neighborhood kids that the firetruck carrying Santa is not far behind. Like the siren song of an ice cream truck, kids hear the music and come running out of their homes to greet their hero in red, who gives them all a little present. It's a sweet iconic touch to a holiday otherwise filled with Black Friday and Super Saturday consumerism.

At our home, our Christmas tree is up and our penguin wreath on the door... Christmas break can't come soon enough.

Christmas 1976

A blast from the past... I am 2 years old in these pictures; we had just moved from the army base in Tacoma, Washington to my grandparent's home in Rockland, NY. My grandfather is the one dressed as the bank-robber-like-masked Santa, and the costume is still in the family - ready to scare the stuffing out of the next generation.

My dad, aunt and grandma ... this blue velvet couch is still in my grandparent's living room in Rockland

My mom and grandpa try to comfort me ... in my defense, that's one creepy looking Santa!

An Italian Thanksgiving

My small contribution to dinner: Antipasto (marinated olives, prosciutto, mozzarella, artichoke hearts, provolone cheese, roasted peppers, ham, three types of salami); Manhattan Coffee Soda; and Rainbow Cookies.

88 years old and still a "leg man"

Before Thanksgiving break, I was in debilitating pain. Everyone at school pitched in, and somehow I managed with their help. In between the pain and teaching classes, I got quite a few surprise visits from seniors whom I taught last year. It was wonderful to hear their college stories, and I was truly humbled by the  fact that they were so excited to share their stories with me.

My Uncle Frank - cutting the bird

I slept most of Tuesday (after getting home from school and grocery shopping) and all of Wednesday... so by the time Thursday rolled around, I was feeling up to dinner at my uncle's house. It was a perfect meal - with all my family gathered together in one spot. We were even able to skype-in my mom, dad, sister, and dogs using my uncle's large screen Web-TV. (And yes, my mom actually held up each of the dogs in turn so I could see them)

This Thanksgiving, I am also especially grateful for the carcinoid community - and I draw on their love, strength, support and courage every single day.

My grandparents have been married for over 60 years - and at dinner, they were holding hands under the table.. so cute!

The Family (minus CA crew and 3 cousins who were running late)

Typical post-turkey chat between grandpa and Gary... the black and white picture in the background is of my great-grandfather (Sicilian immigrant) playing bocce ball

Halloween Treats

"Cinderella" - Halloween 1976

At school, we have a tradition of allowing the seniors to dress up on Halloween (which is even that much more of a treat for them because the rest of the grades have to wear their school uniforms). Since school was canceled Monday (Halloween) due to the weather, seniors had to wait until this past Friday to wear their costumes.

The great thing about Halloween at PC is that everyone dresses up - not a single senior wears a uniform that day, and the creativity is overwhelming.

Halloween is my favorite holiday; there aren't any romantic expectations attached to it or a big price tag - just the fun of playing dress up and being rewarded in chocolate for your efforts. We all wear masks; Halloween is a time when our masks are of our own making, and not those we feel compelled to wear out of insecurity or shame.

"Angel" - Halloween at PC 2011

Halloween gives us complete freedom to morph into a new identity and use our imaginations. As we grow older, we are so busy with trying to keep up with credit debt, and family obligations, and job duties, and the latest technological advances that the simple power of "pretending" is lost. This is why, for me, Halloween is so wonderful. It is a purely self-indulgent holiday, filled with giggles and smiles from children and adults alike. It's ironic that Halloween is the one day when everyone looks crazily different, yet everyone is unconditionally accepted for how they look... if only every day were more like that.

Having a snow-day on Halloween made the holiday that much sweeter, and I used the extra day off to treat myself to a lazy day of grading and watching a fantastic "B" movie: Bubba Ho-Tep, which I absolutely loved.

Bubba Ho-Tep is an unlikely buddy movie that tells the tale of two nursing home residents - one who believes he's JFK (Ossie Davis) and the other who believes he's Elvis (Bruce Campbell) - as they battle an ancient Egyptian mummy that is sucking the life out of the near-dead elderly residents. It's quirky, off-beat, and delightful - and served as the perfect ending to a strange and wonderful "winter-white" Halloween in Jersey.

Happy 4th of July

My sister took this pic going over the George Washington Bridge today ...


My mom, sister and I spent the morning visiting my grandmother in the cardiac ICU at NY Presbyterian Hospital, and the afternoon visiting my grandfather at his nursing home / rehab facility in NJ.

I am happy to report that they were both in great spirits and up to their old antics; in fact, they were joking around so much that my props were superfluous... But hey, when else can you wear flags on your head?



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Memorial Day Memories

My father is a West Point graduate, and my mother was a military wife (as were both of my grandmothers). Memorial Day gives us a chance to say thank you... to the soldiers and families of soldiers who make the ultimate sacrifice, every day.

My mom and dad (now divorced) were married at West Point


My Dad and I on the army base in Washington State

Even tough army officers have to change diapers and make little airplane noises to get their babies to eat...

My grandpa Di Maria in his air force uniform with my grandmother. (They have been married for over 60 years.)


My paternal grandfather, who died from diabetes before I was born, in his army uniform.




(I'm not a Tim McGraw fan... but darn this video is good.)

New Year's Resolution

The best advice I ever got concerning new year's resolutions was dispensed by one of my favorite grad school professors. She said that most people set themselves up for failure because they plan to unrealistically change their whole life by just uttering a single vague sentence: I'll eat healthy; I'll exercise everyday; I'll stop procrastinating.... "If you really want to make a change" she said, "change your life by one degree."

She reminded me that one degree can alter outcomes drastically; after all, the difference between water freezing or boiling lies within one degree. The overall message is a good one - just one small change can significantly impact your quality of life.

So this year, my resolution is to keep what I'm calling a "thankful journal" where I write down - every day - at least three things I'm thankful for. Since I've started keeping the journal, I have become more aware of all the little things that make my life so wonderful - little things that previously, I would have taken for granted. Life is too short not to relish in the beauty of it, and now, at least for a few minutes every day, I remind myself of that fact.

My "Thankful Journal"

"If you think you're too small to make a difference or that your voice is too small to be heard, you've obviously never been in a tent with a mosquito" - unknown

Ghost of Christmas Past

Christmas 1974 with My Mom in Tacoma, WA

Christmas 1983 with My Baby Sister in Ridgewood, NJ

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree...

For the last three years, Gary and I have wanted to get a Christmas tree; this year, we made it happen. As I unsnapped the plastic storage container marked "Christmas" in big black Sharpie, the first two ornaments I saw were reminders of my life in San Francisco. One thing cancer makes you acutely aware of is that time is limited, which is why I decided to ask my mom for a very special Christmas present this year; specifically, I asked her to split airfare with me back to California. So this February, my best friend from NJ (Christine) is going to San Francisco with me to meet my best friend from my time working at Riordan (Diana) - it will be an incredibly special and fun-filled few days. Then, off to San Diego to spend two days with Christine, my mom, step-dad, sister and dogs. I've put off this trip for too long - I can't wait for part of my New Jersey life to meet up with my California past.

Ornaments: San Francisco Trolley and Riordan High School, SF

A Family Thanksgiving

Gary and I celebrated Thanksgiving this year with my entire extended Italian family (with the exception of my sister and mom - who we "skyped" in from San Diego, CA via laptop computer). The meal was a typical 5-course Italian holiday dinner:

Antipasto (my contribution - pictured)

Primo: lasagna
Secondo: organic turkey (Griggstown Farm)
Contorni: yams and marshmallows, two types of stuffing, green beans, breaded asparagus, spaghetti squash, mash potatoes, cranberry jello, stuffed mushrooms
Dolce: cannoli, chocolate cake, pie (apple and blueberry), cookies, pumpkin cheesecake

The nicest part of the dinner, however, wasn't the incredible food - rather it was the people around the dinner table who made it a day I'll always treasure - Gary, my uncle, my aunt, my grandparents, my cousins...we were all together, in one place, simultaneously sharing memories and making them.

Of course, one dinner table topic of conversation was my health - everyone wanted to know: is the cancer gone? I guess you could say that I'm in remission, since technically that means that you aren't showing signs or symptoms of the cancer. Remission, however, does not mean "cured" - even if you do not show signs or symptoms, cancer cells may still be growing like crazy. Also, my neuroendocrine system has been forever effected as a result of the cancer- and fevers and pain are still a daily struggle. So I guess I just don't have a solid answer. There is part of me that wants to say, "yup - 100% A-OK, don't worry - nothing to see here - everything is perfect"... and then there is the other part of me that wants to say, "it's too early to tell so don't leave my side for too long"... Regardless of what the cancer may or may not do in the future, right now - I am so very grateful for the time I have.

A Pre-Dinner Read
Three Generations: my grandmother, aunt and cousin

Watching Thanksgiving Football
Three Generations: my grandfather, uncle and cousins
Bonus: a picture of my great grandfather and his father playing bocce ball
Double Bonus: Gary!

Halloween Treat: Dinner at Elements

Elements, Princeton NJ

Gary and I love amazing food, and have flown everywhere in search of it; from celebrity-chef-owned restaurants like Moto in Chicago that use molecular gastronomy to create avante-garde cuisine, to historical restaurants like The Olde Pink House in Savannah that improve upon quintessential comfort food. For obvious reasons, we haven't indulged in such gastric delights in a long time.

One of our favorite restaurants in New Jersey is Elements in Princeton. When we learned that they had a tasting menu during the month of October to celebrate their 2-year anniversary, we decided to take the dive back into fine dining.

If you've never eaten at Elements and you live anywhere near New Jersey - go. Firstly, the space is unbelievable; they actually transformed part of a garage into an architectural marvel. Secondly, the food is incredible. Dinner was perfect, and I've done my best to remember all seven courses, listed below.

Amuse Bouche - Champagne, Coconut-Broccoli Cream Soup, Winter Barley Salad
First Course - Hamachi Tartare with Cilantro
Second Course - Squash Soup with Corned Beef and Cabbage, and Caraway Ice Cream
Third Course - Pacific Halibut with Chopped Geoduck, Toasted Pumpkin Seeds, Broccoli, and Pumpkin Puree
Fourth Course - Wild New Jersey Mushroom Risotto with Mushroom Froth
Fifth Course - 48-hour Short Ribs with Red Potatoes and Kale
Sixth Course - MY FAVORITE - Bacon and Eggs
Seventh Course - Pumpkin Cheesecake with Gingerbread Sorbet
Complimentary Dessert - Chocolate Plate (6 homemade chocolates...the best being caramel peanut-butter filled dark chocolate truffle)

"Bacon and Eggs" at Elements

Ok - that sixth course deserves a pause and further description. It is the chef's signature dish that serves as a bridge between the savory and sweet courses. On one side of the plate is a hollowed out eggshell with three layers of gooey goodness inside: the bottom is brioche French toast, the middle is bacon custard, the top is maple foam with smoked sea salt. On the other side of the plate is a mini French toast with homemade bacon and bourbon maple syrup. It's insane.

Although my appetite is much smaller than it used to be, I took my time and managed to at least savor a little of everything. It was an absolutely wonderful night.